"The fullness of joy is to behold God in everything." [Julian of Norwich]We did not have a flashlight, but the three of us decided to go into the cave anyway. As is always the case with these kinds of things, I hid my trepidation and spoke my chutzpah into being. "Yes, of course, let's go." Guided only by the light of Andrea's phone, we ventured forth, crouching almost immediately as the roof of the cave fell and the ground rose as if to kiss it.
Soon we were on all fours. Because my distrust of the ceiling was greater than that of the floor (probably something to do with the laws of gravity--the floor was not going to fall on top of me), I crawled like a crab, awkwardly scooching my way over slippery rocks, extending my feet out to test the next one.
How far in would we go? How far could we go? Here we were, moving blindly both literally and figuratively forward into this cave. I was no longer afraid, not really. It seemed I had left my fear at the entrance because now, my only thoughts were of what I was doing in that exact moment--my movements from stone to stone, over the slow trickle of icy water heading in the opposite direction.
About fifty feet into our crawl, we ran into two hikers on their way out. "Do you want to use our flashlight? Really, it's no problem. We'll wait for you at the entrance, but take as long as you need." Of course, we took it, thrilled by this unexpected kindness. We thought we had been alone in the cave. "Keep going," the hikers told us. "You're almost there, and it's so worth it."
We forged ahead with our new lamp, bumping our way, despite improved visibility, towards an unknown but apparently worthy destination. After a bit, however, we started to hear it. It was gentle, rumbling and satisfying: a bass line vibrating so that we could feel it through the cold rock.
And then we pushed through, and suddenly, the smallness we had felt for so long opened into a room, a secret space tucked away from everything else, beneath boulders and trees and all that was on the outside. Here we were! This room, so completely hidden and yet made known to us as if it had been made for us.
I looked up, and from the ceiling fifty feet above us, poured forth a steady and heavy waterfall. Its rushing filled the room, and the coolness of its mist blew past us like a whirlwind. I felt my chest lift towards the source of the water, like a heart opener drawing me up to something that seemed so alive and strong. Something like nothing I had ever experienced before.
Behold, the Mystery of Life!
